


Snow Angels

by BettyHT



Series: Laine [3]
Category: Bonanza
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2018-11-07
Packaged: 2019-08-20 07:02:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16551170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BettyHT/pseuds/BettyHT
Summary: An epilogue to Turn, Turn, Turn with a little bit of Laine remembering a better time with Adam and then how it was for her when he was gone.





	Snow Angels

Snow Angels

Chapter 1

All Laine had left were memories of Adam. They were the only comfort she had. Laine remembered that night of the snow angels quite well and how it had happened in their little rented home in Denver. They had gone there after their marriage and a short trip to San Francisco before Adam had to go to Denver to complete an assignment there. It was the first of three such assignments before they settled in San Francisco for three years until his illness had sent them back to the Ponderosa. They had learned to communicate better than they did in those days. That argument had been silly really, but then all of their arguments were silly when you looked at them afterwards especially in those first months of their marriage. It seemed they were always the result of frustration and worry, and then there would be some complaint which set off the argument. A lot alike in many ways, they would let problems, big and small, gnaw at them until they were tense and on edge. Then they would argue about something small and get all the anger out which was always followed by some sweet time of making up for all the negative remarks and behavior. That was the best part of having those fights. The release of the tension and the opportunity to talk through the issues were beneficial, but there was nothing like the feeling of being needed and wanted that making up brought about. That one night though she had taken it a step further when they argued because she had gotten so furious she told him to get out. He had stomped off to do chores as he was wont to do when words failed them, and in a fit of pique, she had locked the door behind him after he left.

There was snow blanketing everything, and he had gone to see to the animals in the stable to be sure they were all right. He knew she would have been most worried about her chickens for she needed eggs to do the baking for Christmas, and he had taken care of them first. She knew he would because he would never take his anger out on the animals in his care. But that had been an hour, and she was expecting him to be back with a basket of eggs and a willingness to talk. Unlocking the door, she found no sign of him but only swirling snow right up to the door not even seeing the tracks he must have made when he left. So she had readied herself for bed, but he still had not returned to the house even after another hour.

With the snow and the cold, he had tried the door once and finding it locked, he had been angry and gone back to the stable to stew a bit, but then came up with a different plan for his return. She didn't know that and worried about where he had gone. It was night but not as dark as some nights because there was a full moon shining through the breaking clouds reflecting from all the new fallen snow. She looked out and the stable doors were closed. Worried and then a bit scared, she was frightened that he might have taken a horse and ridden to a neighbor's house. It wasn't more than a mile, but in this snow, the trip was treacherous, and she would have no way of knowing if he had gotten there safely. They would not have expected him either. As far as she knew, he could be out there in that heavy snow hurt and unable to get help, and she blamed herself. She wondered but then logically concluded that an intelligent and proud man like her husband would never do something stupid like that. Finally the snowfall had diminished to a few shimmering flakes floating down through the moonlight as the clouds broke apart.

As she stared out the window at the stable, she thought she heard her name being called. She went to the door again, but he wasn't there. She did notice that the wind had stopped blowing too. She looked out and saw a snow angel at the foot of the porch steps. Hearing her name again, she rushed to the kitchen, and looking out the window, she saw another snow angel outside the kitchen window. Again and again, she was called to the windows of their little home and saw snow angels outside each one. He had made a ring of them around their home. She opened the front door and waited for him. He trudged up the front porch steps looking like some kind of snow monster as his coat, pants, and hat were covered in snow. He stepped through the door and closed it, but then grabbed her in a fierce hug.

"Adam, you're getting my nightgown all wet. Let's get you out of those wet things."

Quickly, Adam dropped his wet coat, his pants after pulling off his boots, and his hat on a pile. Then he peeled off his shirt that was soaked with perspiration.

"I'm sorry I don't help you more around the house, and that I don't talk when I get home sometimes. I'll try to be more helpful, but know too that I worry about my job and sometimes I need to think about things before I can talk about them. But right now, I think I ought to help you out of that wet nightgown before you catch cold."

"I'll be fine. We need to get you warmed up. You're cold."

"Only on the surface, sweetheart. Inside there's a fire burning hot. I see you've got a nice hot fire in the fireplace too. Let's lie down on the rug there so you can warm me up."

"Let me get some blankets and a quilt. You can stand by the fire and warm up as much as you can until I get back."

Soon she was back with an armload of bedding. She would have suggested they both crawl into their bed, but that quick trip to the bedroom let her know that room was far cooler than this one. She had pulled a dry nightgown on and grabbed two blankets and the big thick quilt from their bed as well as two pillows. She could barely see to carry all of that so Adam rushed to help her spreading the blankets on the rug for more cushioning and then lying down and pulling the quilt over himself as he waited for her to join him there. Because Adam's hands were too cold to touch her, she lay beside him and wrapped her arms around him as well as she could. Even that contact made her shiver so he told her to turn on her side as he lay behind her with the fire to his back. He rubbed his hands up and down his arms to restore more circulation in both his hands and his arms. After a short time, he was feeling much better.

"I'm warm now. How about you?"

"Getting very warm, thank you. I like this. It's very romantic." She turned toward him then and touched his cheek with her hand caressing him softly.

"Did you like your snow angels?"

"Very much especially the one that walked in the house tonight."

"The thoughts I'm having right now are not very angelic."

"Oh, that's quite all right. I'm having the same kind of thoughts."

"Don't lock me out again."

"Never. I learned my lesson tonight. I think we need to find a better way to communicate other than with anger. We need to talk when things are bothering us. We've only been married a few months. We can't keep going like this."

"I agree. We should probably promise to talk when things are bothering us and we can remind each other of that promise when it's clear that we're holding back."

"Agreed. Now, about those kinds of thoughts, I never hold back when I tell you that I love you. I would like to show you how much right now."

"That would be heavenly."

"Yes, my angel, it would be."

And they had shared a laugh before they kissed and showed their love to each other. That had been the night she told him she was sure she was with child. It had been almost the three months mark, and she was sure that they were going to have a baby. He had been overjoyed, and with the snow making travel treacherous the next day, he had stayed home and spent time with her talking and planning their future. They had agreed that if they couldn't agree, they would set priorities and each would give in on those things that were not priorities until they had a compromise. It had worked very well for them in the five years of their marriage.

Now, she had a new baby on the way and a future wide open with possibilities but had a father-in-law intent on dictating how things would go. Adam was gone, lost to her after the procedure to remove the blood clots in his brain, which had threatened his life only a few months earlier. He had quit his job with Wells Fargo and sold their home in San Francisco. They had been living with his father on the Ponderosa. It had been devastating to all of them when infection had taken his life after the procedure had seemed to be successful. There was nothing that anyone could do to help him. He died a week after the procedure and suffered terribly until that happened. It took months before the family started to function normally again. Ben of course thought it would be fine for Laine and Patsy to continue to live on the Ponderosa as they had been because he doted on his granddaughter who adored him as well. However, with another child on the way that Ben didn't know about yet, Laine wasn't sure what she should do.

Laine was in an entirely different situation, and she didn't know how to respond. Ben wasn't her husband even though he could be certainly as exasperating as one. They argued and they tried to be civil to one another, but Ben was used to getting his way in his house and certainly not used to letting a woman have a say in matters of importance. Patsy was going to go to school soon. Laine wanted to set up a small school on the Ponderosa and teach the children herself. All she needed was that the house that Adam had designed be built. There were enough children that she could do it too. It would be safer and more convenient for the children who would not have to spend hours traveling each day, and it would be more fulfilling for her to have something to do. She hoped to spend her time with the children, and wanted her own home even if it was close to the main house. Ben however was not in favor of the idea at all, and now she knew from whom Adam had gotten that stubbornness. The rest of the family was staying out of this one willing to accept either alternative. Adam had told Laine once that the person to ask for help in such a situation was Hoss so she sought him out. They talked and he asked how she and Adam had settled their differences because he knew his brother's temper and stubbornness matched their father's. Laine told him the story of the snow angels leaving out the more intimate parts of course. He laughed and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"Gal, you gotta tell Pa that one. He'll like hearing it 'cause it's about Adam, but it's got a message in there that he needs to hear too. Tonight, we're all having dinner together. When we're all sitting quiet like after dinner feeling all full and warm and such, you tell that story. I think that could make all the difference in how things go from here on out."

That night at dinner, Laine tried to fortify herself with thoughts of Adam. It was something she did when she was troubled which was often. It had started that first week when he was so terribly ill with the infection in his brain. Doctor Martin had removed the bandage on his head to find the small wound slightly reddish. He had opened the stitches and pulled back the flap of skin to find that Adam found the pain of what he was doing to be excruciating. Her next virtual conversation with Adam was going to be much easier if Ben agreed with her ideas after she told him the story as Adam had told her. It worked too. After they talked and Ben understood better what was going on, she dropped the hint too that she was carrying a child. The look on Ben's face was priceless. She wanted Adam's son to live in the house his father designed and to grow up with his father's things there hearing stories of his father's life. If Ben wanted to be a positive part of that, he had to know he needed to work with her and not against her. She saw the understanding develop as he looked at her.

"Let's take a look at those plans tomorrow. With Hoss and Joe helping, I'm sure we can find a way to make this work."

It had too. And Adam had grown up proud of his father whom he had never met but surrounded by those who had. They taught him all those things his father would have if he could.


End file.
